No Post On October

It was a special month. Every day is a new day of hope, supposedly, since that institution promised will give me the news in this week. The information I had been waiting for a year and a half. The announcement that anticipated by every candidate. Four turned out to be five, and six catch up shortly. They mentioned four to six, did not they?

However, that bright expectation of a new day turned out to be an unavoidable hopelessness. Every morning the anxiety came by and left me in despair, but I survived -clinging to something that called determination. Yes. The determination of waiting.

Waiting is the most useless activity. Fortunately, eighteen months of struggling gave me the ability to learn the art of waiting. Patience - became the key of this new skill. I ignored all my fear and anxiety, focusing on something that made me active. I ought to do something productive, you might say, to changing the focus of my mind. On the other hand, all I did in that special month is doing nothing patiently. I waste the most precious treasure in the world, time. The impact is significant, in a negative way, and forced me to be more anxious and scared. The new me, the more negative version of me, became too scared to doing anything. Too scared to come out and socialized. Too scared to meet anyone. Too scared to write something in this portal.

Dang, I already posted one, though.

Mission unaccomplished.